


Domestic Encounters of the Third Kind

by potsticker, starsanddust32



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-22
Updated: 2015-09-22
Packaged: 2018-04-22 23:11:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4854215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potsticker/pseuds/potsticker, https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsanddust32/pseuds/starsanddust32
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So this little doodad is a collaboration between myself and the wonderful starsanddust32 (author of My Shield, also in the Carmilla fandom) and will be a series of one shots so utterly full of Hollstein that you may almost forget that we haven't had enough Carmilla in Carmilla for the last few episodes, or that Danny is totally still fawning over Laura or that nobody is caring to notice that Perry is so clearly The Dean! </p>
<p>Essentially, we're trying to ease Creampuff hearts as best we can with some hilarious domestic Hollstein featuring more of the useless side of our favourite useless lesbian vampire.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Domestic Encounters of the Third Kind

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome welcome and thank you for reading! 
> 
> We're just starting out with this series so please bear with us, but we hope you enjoy and feel free to leave any ideas for future domestic situations you'd like us to explore in the comments. 
> 
> Queue the chapter where Laura wants to learn how to cook and Carmilla isn't having any of it.

Laura walked into the living room with a look of pride in her eyes and wafted the cooking class flyer that she had taken off of the Student Union bulletin board around in excitement. She was over the moon that she had found an activity that she could share with Carmilla while also learning a very valuable skill because let’s face it, one can’t live on a diet of cookies, brownies, and grape soda alone, despite how hard they might try. 

Laura found Carmilla sitting on the chaise chair and reading a leather bound book that she was pretty sure was at least a couple centuries old. The only acknowledgement Carmilla gave to Laura’s presence in the room was to place her arm around Laura’s shoulders when she sat herself down on the chaise next to her. 

“Carm, did you hear what I said?” Laura questioned as Carmilla gave no indication that she had heard anything at all.

Carmilla was clearly enthralled in her book, whether it was genuine or an act designed to keep her “air of mystery” Laura couldn’t be sure, but what she was sure of was that she wasn’t going to let Carmilla’s mind games deter her from sharing the exciting news. Flashing back to how distraught JP was about having to rebind the book Carmilla was reading the last time she tried to take it away to get her attention, Laura made sure to move the flyer slowly over the book just enough to block Carmilla’s view of her current page.

Carmilla resisted the immediate urge to incinerate the offending piece of paper and instead, shifted her attention to the words written in bold print at the top of the page.

After taking a moment for the words and their implied meaning to fully register, Carmilla scoffed, "Laura if you think I'm going to learn to cook you hit your head harder on that desk than I thought."

Not letting her girlfriend’s attitude dissuade her, Laura pressed on. “Carm! You can’t dismiss it that easily. It’s something we can do together while learning a valuable skill set! Plus we can learn to bake to offset the cost of buying cookies! So kind of a two birds, one stone thing! It will be fun and you get to spend time with me.”

"I tried baking once in 1701. Turned out that the baker’s daughter was more the culinary success than the loaf." Carmilla responded with a sly grin. 

Laura slightly deflated at the response and the subtle reminder of her girlfriend’s prior “pursuits,” as Laura preferred to call them. Laura had tried to convince Carmilla with logic and had failed so it was time to bust out her big guns. She looked at Carmilla with the biggest puppy eyes she could muster followed by the saddest “Please” she could manage. Carmilla glanced over at her and just when Laura thought her new tactic might work, Carmilla almost choked on the laugh bubbling in her throat. With a huff, Laura stood up from the chaise and moved to her computer.

Carmilla, feeling the change in Laura’s mood, stood up and crossed the room to sit next to her. "Cupcake. Why on earth would I want to learn how to cook? Truthfully, death saved me from ever having to know how."

“It’s fine. I just thought it would be something we could have fun with. You do have a point about the whole ‘I’m a vampire and don’t require food’ thing and I can’t force you to go but that’s not going to keep me from going and enjoying myself!” Laura responded with a new sense of fervor and Carmilla just shook her head at her cupcake.

\---

 

"Come on Grumpy Paws, just try, one bite. You’re acting like Perry after someone else cleans mold off of the bathroom sink. I promise I didn't put garlic in this one!" Laura said as the spoon she had lifted towards Carmilla’s mouth stayed in limbo as the vampire side-eyed it suspiciously.

"Laura, I know I've given you one too many reasons to have heroic notions about me, which side note please remind me to stop doing, but wouldn't history be sad to see the end of ‘The Great Countess Mircalla Karnstein, Destroyer of Worlds’ at the hands of a bolognese made by her 19 year old girlfriend?" 

A beat passed and Carmilla noted Laura’s building frustration with utter glee. 

“Would be just a little anticlimactic, don’t you think?” She added in a smirk for good measure. 

Laura heaved a sigh not too dissimilar to the one that escaped her every time Martha Jones asked one too many dumb questions to the Tenth, and placed the spoon back on the plate. "Fine. Don't want this to go to waste. I'm sure LaF or Perry or maybe even Danny would be happy to try it for me!" Having mentioned Danny’s name she was sure she had this one in the bag.

"Oh I'm sure Pollyanna would be over the moon to even give you a couple of pointers, if you ask _real nice_ " Carmilla made a point to coat those last two words in her signature apathetic drawl, she knew just how well an air of disinterest mixed with just the right amount of sarcasm riled the girl up. Carmilla proceeded to lazily moisten the pad of her left thumb and swiftly used the newly found traction to turn the page of her beaten copy of what Laura could now see to be Plato’s Allegory of the Cave.

First the disinterest in the class, now the complete objection to tasting the fruits of her labour? This just was so not happening. "Come on Carm! It can't be that bad! At least no worse than the failed lasagna"

“And let's not forget here that by ‘failed’”, Carmilla paused and emphasised the word with air quotations, “you mean I had to spend my Wednesday afternoon replacing Mother’s drapes because the raging fire of said ‘failed’ Lasagna wouldn't quit raging for a solid hour and a half.” She deadpanned and continued "I know some people joke about how their spouse’s cooking is awful, but you're really giving that a whole new meaning cupcake"

“Hey, how was I supposed to know that LaF had turned the fire extinguisher into an actual, real life, honest to Lophii, flamethrower? It was a mistake...one anyone could have made!”, Laura’s pitch climbed steadily towards the ceiling, “I'm sorry! It's just that I wanted to surprise you and show you the new skill I had learned at class. I guess I got a little distracted when Perry came in the room with another crow incident...and hey I made it up to you by getting you a new bag of O neg! So really who was the winner in this situation?” She took a breath, “Anyways....please just one bite? that's all I'm asking Carm...please?"

Having decided she’d had her fun she finally caved, "Ugh, you're killin' me Hollis." Carmilla hauled herself from her sprawled position on the chaise and placed her book face down on its arm on her way over to Laura.

She took the spoon from Laura with a look that she was sure was supposed to be frustration, but affection must have seeped through and diluted it because Laura was beaming her classic Hollis smile at her. 

"You know, for someone whose diet consists entirely of artificial colours and flavours, this isn't half bad sweetness"

The vampire paused as she gauged how her reaction landed with the girl in front of her. Deciding that she didn’t want to deal with the now quivering excited mess that was Laura Hollis, Carmilla attempted to dull the blow of the kind-of-compliment to slow the girl down a touch. .

"Not that I'm an expert. The lack of regular eating tends to put a dent in the sophistication of an undead girls palate."

"Thanks Carm! And maybe Perry can help me find something to substitute the garlic with. I’m guessing you never spent too much time in Italy over the years huh?” 

Carmilla grinned rather widely. 

Laura had learned to take that as a sign to prepare herself for a reply of a lude, sarcastic or playful nature. She was working on a theory to narrow things down that involved measuring the height of Carmilla’s raised eyebrow but progress was slow, cracking the code of a professional despoiler of virtue, although a noble task, was not the easiest thing Laura’s ever had to do. 

There was a hesitation from Carmilla and Laura thought that she was just going to let it go without further comment. Laura turned back to return to the kitchen and the bolognese when she felt Carmilla slide up behind her and wrap her in a warm embrace with her head resting on her shoulder. 

“Cupcake. I’ve spent plenty of years in Italy, I just didn’t spend them eating lasagna.” Carmilla whispered in her ear before kissing Laura’s cheek and moving away to leave the brunette flustered

“Really?” Is all Laura could choke out in response and just as her brain had caught up to think of something a little wittier to say her choke turned into an audible sob as her eyes took in the sight of Carmilla’s leather clad backside as she was sauntering back over to the chaise and her book, no doubt adding in that extra hip sway Laura had spotted just to neatly place the cherry on the top of this flirtatious torture cake playing out before her eyes. 

“Useless. Vampire. Girlfriend.” She muttered under her breath as she saw that Carmilla had settled back into her comfortable reading position with nothing but cool amusement plastered across her features. Laura would never understand how Carmilla could go from apparently apathetic to smoldering temptress in point zero seconds. 

Laura decides that’s all she will get out of the impossible girl so she turns to leave the room with the bolognese pot in hand. She had made it halfway out the door when she’s stopped by Carmilla’s sweet low voice once again.

“Cupcake...Leave the bolognese.” Carmilla said while maintaining that deep concentration from earlier. Laura chanced a look over her shoulder and saw the slight side grin she’d become so familiar with settled nicely across Carmilla’s features. She couldn’t hide the swell of pride and excitement that was now bursting through in a wide smile on her own face as she turned back and placed the bolognese on the table next to Carmilla. She shifted the bowl a fraction to the right, spoon stood upright, like a mother sending her children off to school on their first day before she finally turned and left the room. 

~ FIN


End file.
